I learn to let things go

Salam dear diary,

Now that i almost finished my foundation of science in uitm dengkil, i want to make a throwback and thinking about my entire life in this campus. There's lot of things i learnt from here. I went through a phase in my life and i expect to pass through another phase in short time.

Firstly, i learnt a thing about friendship, that is i have to keep my anger until i am not mad anymore. I will have to always try to make good assumptions about my friends. I dont have to feel too bad about myself because everyone have certain things they good at and have certain side that make everybody is attractive to certain person. Another thing is that i have to be and keep having confidence in and about myself. When things dont go exactly as we planned it should be, do not blame anybody. Blame ourselves because we are not supposed to expect everything to be exactly as we planned. Allah's plan is the best because he knows what is the best for us. To make it clear, i will not meet and able to know miza, azreen, umi, my classmates and housemates if i dont placed here, exactly where i am right now because i keep making duas to go to asasi upm. But i dont know what i will do without these people that i destined to meet, not by accident but by His taqdir.

I will not meet him if i were in upm. It is a pleasure to know him as that was part of my love life. Everyone that came across my path is important to me, they help me build myself and help me make more precious memories for me to make it out of benefits to others. I can give love life advice if u want. But...i dont think i am that eligible to give that kind of advice but...i will try.

I learnt to let my friends go and to let my lovelife be paused at this state of time. I must know that i can create a new love story, and i will always know that the things that i let go will always be in my memory to help guide me going through phases in my life.

From the title, i said that i learnt to let things go because i just realised that i am far away from school and my bestfriends since childhood. I cant turn back time. Now i miss my friends, teachers, school, and i am looking forward towards university life. Even now i am eager to look for my life partner. But when i stop the time, i see my parents, they are getting older, my siblings, they are growing so much faster, my grandparents, they gone one by one, my friends, as time passes by we leave each other and i am very sure that someday i will leave thus world. So, instead of letting things go, i also learn to appreciate everything that is around us in this meantime.

I LOVE ALLAH

I LOVE MUHAMMAD SAW

I LOVE MYSELF

I LOVE MY PARENTS

I LOVE MY LIFE

ASASI & RAMADAN

MDS week here is very tiring (for me) because i do not get use to sleep late but i used to wake up very early in the morning so that part was quite easy for me to handle. I woke up my housemates because they usually wake up late in the morning. Their alarm clock are so loud even until now i MUST hear and enjoy their alarm ringtone (kpop errr)...

A week before we start our classes, we had a break.. how i miss those times where i can live leisurely goyang2 kaki at my home (sweet home!) I know right; now, everything has changed almost 270° (my lifestyle of course)

On our first day of class, we were in 1st ramadan. Not very tiring because lectures didnt even started yet but...very awkward...among classmates. Ramadan here is the best! I miss ramadan!

Lecturers...hmm...some of them is quite furious and strict but i knew that they are all nice people. I just like to watch them smiling. That's just it and i like them now.

Me in class is very AWKWARD. The boys wont talk to me. I am an introvert and i dont know how to be friendly. I am who i am and i kinda like myself now.. except for the time when i have to present in front of the class. I was extremely awkward and shy that day, i felt like wanna cry...but i didnt cry. I laughed instead (just my response to my anger)

TAKE A LONG BREAK

A long break, a quit, from school but not from life. Humankind, always waiting and yearning for something or anything throughout their lives. For i am a human, i always waiting eagerly for something. Past days, i eagerly waited for SPM examination to end, and finally! it ended...after days fulled with "happiness" and "satisfication" ...i ended up realized what if i did not struggle for my SPM? what if i did not try my best? all those questions were lingering in my head. i must regret it if i get a bad result.

that is (most) human, they never satisfied with anything that they achieved. it may be hard for them to appreciate a single moment and person for that particular time, they must be waiting for other person and other "precious" moment to come and serve them in their lives.

Back to my story, now, i already got my SPM result. Alhamdulillah :) maybe mine's not the best at other's perspective, it is the best i can achieve, and of course it is the best plan of ALLAH, the Almighty ;) what can i do except to be very grateful towards him. i quickly updated UPU's form. my first choice is AsasiPintarUKM, the second is asasi UITM. I did not apply to asasi pertanian UPM, although my parents (were) and brother is studying there. I want to experience new environment and surroundings. not long after that, my friend Wani told me to check my qualification to pursue my studies at asasipintar UKM, because she did not qualified. Oh, wait...her result and mine was similar. i started to cry. eventually, that night was dark and gloomy.

After a while, i started to think and wonder about univ. life! i don't care about that bad news anymore, UKM is still my 1st choice. i know! i know that i have to start planning, and i am very excited! (inshaAllah it'll be good. No, bettter!)